My last day in the city (town) of the big M and the big K

As my cat lies snuggled up on my bed, i am starting to think wow, this is it.. my last day here as how i see it, as a child. Because obviously i will be coming back here on holidays and when i want to, but i will be an independent, not anything like how it used to be, where mum and dad are there, looking after me, telling me what to do. 


When your younger you always argue with your parents, shout at them say "i hate you" and then wish in your head you could get away from everything and start again! But when that time actually comes, you think back and wish you could go back to that moment and never wish that! 
I haven't always lived in Milton Keynes, ive moved from house to house due to different circumstances, ive gone from Essex (which will always be home), to some village, Bicester, London and then to MK. Overall i think i have lived in 6 different houses, and gone to 8 different schools in the space of 18 years. That may not seem alot.. im not sure, but the space of those moves was from the age of 0-8 so to me moving to MK and actually staying here longer than a year or two felt stable and comforting. So moving brings back scaring memories. 


When adults used to say to you when you were a kid, "I wish i was your age again" You never understood that... but at this point in my life i understand. Because i would love to be my little sisters age again, though she is yet to discover why. 
Being the youngest in the year as well i am moving away from the safety of my home as 18years and 4 weeks old, unlike most who are 19+ or about to turn 19 in a few months... Its indeed a trippy thought. 


My last few weeks have been amazing. Hanging out with friends, seeing family, going out on the town, and meeting people who i haven't seen in 2 years, yet that is another resentment of having to move, moving away from  friendships that are just yet being discovered/discovering again. 
I have to keep reminding myself that i wont be alone, there will be others who will be feeling the same! 


I am just going to end this blog by saying;
Thankyou to everyone who i have met in MK for being there, and i will miss you all so much, but i will still be the same ol' nessa :) I shall never change who i am, and will always stay in contact and visit MK, because the people here are my life, and even though i will be adding towards it whilst away at uni, the people who i have known in MK will be the ones who have made me who i am today and i have them to thank :) Love you all loads! x :) 
and as Arnold Schwarzenegger would say, "i'll be back"<3